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Consternation Condo

Jenny heard the water in the bathroom sink stop and Art walked into the bedroom. Jenny was already in bed and using an app on her tablet to try different decoration ideas. This would be their first night in their condo and her head was buzzing with ideas.

“Hey,” she said, turning the tablet around so Art could so it. “What do you think of this color for the bedroom?”

Art looked at it. “Yeah, blue is nice.”

“It’s ‘Jamaican Bay’,” she told him.

“Is it? It’s still nice,” Art said, getting under the covers.

She looked at the tablet again and tapped on something. “How about this?”

Art took the tablet and looked at the color. Then he handed it back. “I don’t know how I feel about green.”

“It’s ‘Kilkenny’,” she informed him.
“Those bastards!”


Art sighed. “Nothing. I liked the blue better.”

“Jamaican Bay,” she said, investigating more colors.

“Sure, that one. How about you turn off the iPad and we get some sleep?”

“Sleep? On your first night in our new place?” she asked, acting sultry. She turned off the tablet and placed it on the nightstand.

“Well,” he grinned, “we shouldn’t skip our first night.”

Art put his arms around her, sliding one hand down her bare back.

Then there was an enormous banging on the wall.

“What was that?” asked Jenny.

“I don’t know,” said Art, looking about.

There was more banging on the wall.

“Stay here, I’ll check it out,” said Art. He got out of bed, pulled on his pants, he walked out of the bedroom.

Jenny stayed in the bed. There were more banging noises and every time she heard it, she flinched. Then there was a huge bang that nearly knocked a picture off the wall.

Jenny sat with the covers up to just under her nose. But it was all quiet.

Art walked back into the bedroom, undoing his jeans.

“Art! What’s going on?”

“Oh,” he said. He pointed at the wall. “That is the wall that separates us from our neighbor. So I went next door and it turns out there’s some big ass bug crawling on the wall. She tried killing it with a shoe, but the bugger was too quick for her. I grabbed a big book and just slammed that bastard.”

Jenny stared at Art.

“What?” he asked.

“Is she pretty?”

That night Jenny had a dream that Art had an affair with a woman whose face she couldn’t see. For the entirety of the next day, she was angry with Art.

And he never knew why.

The End